so maybe my mistakes were my downfall. but maybe, my mistakes weren't even mistakes.
because you and me would never, could never be anything.
you're the boy i've loved since the day i saw you. you're the boy who i never got over. you're the boy who made every other boy seem incomparable - because to me, you were 'the one.' it was you.
but that's why its so risky to even think of being attached to you that way again. because in my mind, you're still that insanely charismatic boy who shined so bright, i could barely muster a word to say to you, let alone look you in the eye. and i know that things are different now and instead you're the shy one who can't look me in the eye and i'm the more outgoing one, but something in me wanted to resist you so badly.
so when you slowly took those cement walls down, you genuinely, truly surprised me when you did. because once they were down, it was like everything came flooding back. and i knew it was a dangerous game to play, and i knew that to rely on you was unstable, and i knew that to think you could ever feel the same way was madness at its most insane. and i still wanted to hate you but i couldn't, because you don't even know how beautiful you are to me.